I've just discovered something enormously entertaining - digging through the "missed connections" section of craigslist personals. If you haven't seen it, it's like... I guess I can't really compare it to anything I've ever seen, but here's an analogy: "missed connections" is like putting a message in a bottle, throwing it in the ocean, and hoping it finds its way to one specific person.

Here are some highlights from the "women 4 men" section.

This one is pretty mushy. Assuming the guy found it, what the heck would he do? "Damn baby, I know things didn't work out between us, but I did not know you cried for 3 days. And then you ate a Kashi bar! Clearly, I have done you wrong, and for that I am sorry."

I still don't know why you had to end it with us. I thought we were happy in our little routine of skating and bowling and all the things we both love to do. My only thought is that maybe you are going to follow your dream, the one you told me about that night when we stayed up all night over at your place and I cut my foot on the broken piece of glass on the driveway and you held me all night. I wish you knew that I would not have ever tried to stop you from that. I would have supported that dream. But all that is over now. You have moved on and and I did nothing but cry for three days straight until finally my landlord had to come over and bring me cranberry drink and a Kashi bar. I don't hold it against you. I can't make you love me if you don't. But it doesn't change it that I still love you no matter what you do or where you go.

This is just the epitome of pointless. Every dork who thinks he's hot, or likes blondes (or both) will write back to her.

You are smokin' hot That's all. -the blonde.

This one is just stunning... just go talk to the guy!

I saw you today. You look right through me! I know you don't know me, but you are really attractive. I don't know what these feelings are, but everytime I leave I have to sit in my car for a second and calm down. The feelings over take my body and I feel like one day it will be real. I know your only a gas station attendant, but sometimes you find love in the simplest places. I love you. I don't know what this is. Maybe it's love. Maybe it's lust. Maybe its you, you see me, I see you. See you everyday, until I wake up to you.